The other day I read an article about a piece published in the Observer, a British paper. They’d taken a couple of size 16 women, models, and done a photo shoot. The idea being that size 16 is the average size of British women. They were shocked by the results feeling that the women were too overtly feminine. “Almost fetishistic” was the phrase they used, suggesting the only people that could find these women attractive are in some way perverted.
I was gob-smacked when I read that. Not because someone thinks fat women are unattractive, hello, where’s the surprise in that; but because I believed it! My whole life I’ve lived by a premise that covering up is my god given duty because I’m fat. I always thought that was to hide my shame but I see now it’s so that other people don’t feel embarrassed. And not embarrassed on my behalf; it actually makes more sense that they feel confronted by my ‘overtly feminine’ curves. As if it’s a crime to be curvy.
The worse thing is that I want to change. All my life I’ve believed all those messages telling me to change, to be thinner, that I’m not good enough the way I am. And yet secretly I love my curves. I think they’re totally kick ass. It’s no wonder I spend so much time confused about my body.
So I’ve decided to declare myself as a ‘pervert’ because I think these woman look incredibly sexy and beautiful. Of course this means that I’m going to have to let go of some of my own preconceptions about myself and that actually sounds like a really good idea.
So, are you a pervert?
LISA
About Lisa
Ha. I don’t know if I’m a perv but I wanted to applaud you for loving yourself just the way you are.
There’s nothing more sexy than self-confidence.
Thank you Vered. I agree self-confidence is sexy and it actually feels really good too. Go figure.
““Almost fetishistic” was the phrase they used, suggesting the only people that could find these women attractive are in some way perverted.”
I suppose I am pervert. I love women au’naturelle – as they are, warts and all. I have been married to the same woman for 10 years (lived together for 15), and not one day goes by without me hearing or sensing that she feels bad about herself because she’s not a size 2, that she has hairy calves and no butt to write home about. She’s a healthy size 18 and I love every cubic inch to bits, she’s beautiful, witty, intelligent, loving and caring and so insanely womanly that she sends my head spinning many times a day!
A traditional model-sized woman walking down the street, however beautiful she might be won’t make me look twice or even notice her. A woman a healthy size 12+ will make me take note and if she’s got poise, make me look twice appreciatively.
So yeah, I am pervert. And honestly, I truly believe that most mature men are. We don’t want waifs, we want women – full-sized hot women.
Henric
It’s wonderful to hear from men than curvy is ok, good even.
I really appreciate it.
Thanks Henric
I’m NORMAL and I think these women women are gorgeous! What’s the world coming to? Let me add that I was watching a beauty pageant (i was bored) and it’s changed so much now. The women are all ridiculously skinny, and they basically just looked like clones. It was honestly hard to find them attractive.
Interesting and weird. It really tells how far the skinny ideal has went. If women actually accentuated their own, variated forms, were would the world be? ( a better and more happy place , probably, but society has always tried to control and restrict the shape of women). My own body I like and get along with, it’s curvy and yet fit, and I like to wear fitted clothes and not too bulky. not too “revealing”, but pieces like that will automatically accentuate my curvy figure. It can feel vulgar although I dont think it outta make me feel like that, but due to the article above that there is a underlying thought that women should have a restrictive policy of not be too much of..their own shape. I think it’s a controlling thing. Women, do let your curves say hi to the public. It’s a part of us everyday and not a fetisch, it’s normal.
Hi Emma,
You’re right. Its controlling. I hadn’t really thought of it like that but I agree.
LISA
I think these women are beautiful and so are their curves. I think all women are beautiful. I am a size two and that’s just how I am, but I eat like crazy and I am also curvy. I feel sad sometimes because I can’t be more curvy…it’s not how i am built. I don’t diet at all, I think all sizes and shapes are pretty and desirable. <3 im so happy you love your body